RIP M.J.

When I was roughly 6 or 7 years old, I vividly remember my Dad trying to explain to me how the loss of Elvis impacted the world. I listened and tried to understand, as much as I could understand fame at such a tender age, and wondered what the big deal was about this Elvis guy. My father proudly took out some of his vinyl, put Elvis on so I could have a listen, and waited for things to click inside my brain. Ya know, for me to "get it". Sadly, this never happened, and I ended up giving him some half-assed shruggy shoulders, saying something to the effect that I didn't really care for the music. I clearly remember my Dad's look of shock and utter disappointment, completely dumbfounded that his daughter didn't take to Elvis' music. I tried to make him feel better by telling him there were two songs that I kind of liked, but the damage had already been done. And at the end of our "bonding" session over Elvis, I remember thinking to myself, "geez, what's the big deal? So what if I don't like this Elvis guy? I can't help it if his music sucks."

I now realize, 25 years later, payback time has arrived.

As we all know by this point, Michael Jackson died yesterday. Naturally, today's airwaves were inundated with stories of the old, beloved Michael Jackson, in between singing down memory lane with his songs. Zach and I were driving downtown, and after a few minutes of listening intently, asked me who this Michael Jackson guy was. With the fervor only a child of the 80's could possess, I began to explain how amazing & groundbreaking he was when I was about his age, and started giving him a crash course in the discography of MJ. Of course, I was armed with my iPod, (which is loaded with the essential Michael Jackson tunes) and I wasn't afraid to use it. As he listened to the first song, he asked, "Mommy, isn't Michael a boy's name?" I assured him it was, and he kept on listening, with a mildly puzzled look on his face. Midway through the song, he asked once more, "Mommy, you said he's a boy, right?". I, again, assured him MJ was indeed a male person, and he continued to listen to the rest of the song. At the end, he said it was ok, but Michael sounded like a girl. Ok, I'll give him that one. Michael Jackson was somewhat effeminate, but it was just something we were all used to. I forgot my son is new to this, and after a while (I assured myself), he wouldn't notice it anymore.

Wrong.

Any and every song he heard afterward, he only zeroed in on how he sounded like a "man-woman", which was apparently something he could not look past at the age of six. I asked him to let that part go, concentrate on the music, and see if he liked it. That's when it happened.

I got the shruggy shoulders.

The same ones I gave my Dad two decades ago, when he was trying to share Elvis with me. I found myself saying the same words my Dad did back in 1981 - something to the effect of, "awww c'mon! You don't see it? Really? How do you not like that?" It wasn't said in an accusatory way, or in a demeaning way. It was only said in an utterly confused way. I was seriously stunned that my son didn't like what he was listening to. Of course, several hours later, I see now that Michael Jackson's music is very nostalgic for me, and holds real sentimental value. Someone hearing it for the first time, at the age of six, isn't necessarily going to take to it and start moonwalking with me. But, for a moment in time, I had a flash of that scene in 1981, on the living room floor with my Dad, and I finally understood his big sigh and obvious disappointment that I was never going to "get it". Elvis is something you had to live through to really understand the magnitude of his music & his presence, and I think Michael Jackson is going to be the same exact thing. He's my Elvis. And Zach will never really fully understand, unless the equivalent to his modern-day-Elvis dies one day.

The news of MJ's death was quite shocking to me, to be honest. Very weird. I initially felt I was too young to start witnessing the deaths of people who were idols and larger than life to me as a child. I know there's no real right or wrong time for that to start happening, but this just seemed to soon. And Farrah Fawcett. She was my parent's age, which makes it all hit too close to home. Granted, I didn't have "the" poster on my wall as a kid in the late 70's, early 80's, but I was a fan of Charlie's Angels back in the day. And hell, her nipples were the topic of one of me & Aaron's very first conversations - the conversation that made me realize I might be falling for this funny, sweet, smiling bald guy. It's weird to lose two icons like that in the same day.

And let me say, to all the Michael Jackson haters, please leave your nasty, distasteful comments elsewhere. And also, to all the snooty Facebook users, who don't want to give people any room to digest the loss of a childhood icon ... poo on you. I can't tell you how sick I am of reading people's condescending status updates that try to make people feel bad or dumb for having a reaction to Michael Jackson's passing. Things like what it says about us as a society if we're sad he has died. Or how shallow and ridiculous we all are because soldiers are dying in Iraq every day and no one makes this big of a production. Or how we should be this affected by North Korea and their threats of nuclear war, but no -- go ahead and be sad about Michael Jackson. Get over yourselves, people. No one is disputing that it's sad when a soldier dies, or that nuclear war is a real, imminent threat. But can't you let people feel something other than a political reaction when an artist dies? Do political views & agendas need to pop up in every facet of every event in every day of life? I say no; it's ok for people to mourn Michael Jackson's death, and not to feel bad or stupid because of it. Lots of memories were made while listening to his music, and all the Justin Timberlake's of the world have a career now because Michael Jackson existed when he did. His talent was extraordinary, & something to be celebrated.

It's a shame he became the butt of so many jokes, and his eccentricity seemed to outweigh his talent in the later years. But, for plenty of people like me, he will remain the epitome of coolness, and we'll remember him in his prime. He's now in a place where he is free of judgement, pressure, and flashing camera bulbs, so maybe that will mean he finally finds peace. He seemed like a troubled soul, and I'm sure it was exhausting to live that way for so many years. I'm glad I was able to witness his talent, and I hope my kid has a Michael Jackson in his generation to enjoy as he grows up. There's nothing like a great entertainer, and MJ was one of the best.