Mary Ann and Garrett

This about sums up how I'm feeling today. Sprinkle in a teensy bit of sadness, and I guess that would be a bit more accurate. Happy, with a tinge of sad. Well, and grateful. And reflective. Ok, that's it -- happy, grateful, reflective, with a tinge of sad.

I have lost two friends over the last month, and it's impossible not to be at least a little reflective when these sorts of things happen. One I hadn't talked to in several years, but we were very good buddies during our formative years, the other a co-worker that I hadn't heard from since the new year, because she fell ill and left work. Both hilarious human beings. Both an asset to the people who's lives they touched. Both sorely missed now.

I have always made it a point to be in the moment, and truly grateful for all I have attained, been given, and enjoyed. Finding out about these two friends just helped reinforced my attitude of gratitude, and made me, as well as a few others, realize again  how important it is to love and hug to the fullest. I am thankful to have shared embraces with mutual friends over the passing of these two individuals, and I'm sure our late friends would be happy to know they helped stir up those feelings of love and wanting to show the people who are still here how much we care about each other. These two loved big and laughed big, and today, I honor them both.

Garrett Cassel

August 23, 1976 - March 18, 2014

Mary Ann Spittler

August 14, 1964 - April 9, 2014

Cheers to you, guys. We love you.

☮✝✿

Cruise recap - spring break 2014

I have been meaning to post my cruise pictures, but Blogger and I have not gotten along lately when it comes to photos. Therefore, I've been putting it off. But, I have a little time to kill, I have silence, and I have a steamy hot cup of coffee, so I'm willing to go to battle with Blogger and give it a try. I've waited so long to attempt this, I'm almost positive everyone in my life has lost interest by now (we got back from the cruise 24 days ago), but hopefully they'll still tell a good story. If nothing else, they'll be something for me to look back on, when I'm drowning in my own sea of desperation born from wanting to get out of town again. Yes, that desperation is bubbling already. It's-a coming. Ack!

This year, we went on the same ship as we did last year, Navigator of the Seas. Out of all the cruises we have taken, this ship is probably my favorite. I don't have an exact reason why, but it speaks to me. Royal Caribbean had done some cosmetic renovations shortly before we got on board, and those little touches just made her that much more beautiful. It was so good to be back!

Our cabin this year - no balcony (sniffle), but it was still fantastic.

 

Our room.

 

My folks' room.

 

The grand main dining room (where we never eat). We aren't the dress-up type, so we prefer the casual buffet up on deck 11 at The Windjammer.

 

The main pool deck, with a newly added giant screen TV.

 

The Solarium (adult-only pool), where we never get to go since we cruise with our kid.

*crying into my vodka tonic - I can't stand other people's kids*

 

The views from the Solarium are awesome.

 

The Royal Promenade, which is the heart of the ship. Several bars and small eateries line the main thoroughfare, and they added the touch of making it change colors every so often. This was the normal color of it ...

 

This was when it was blue ...

 

And this was when it was red. The only color I didn't catch on camera was when it turned yellow, but that's ok. Guess I'll just have to book another cruise to get that shot.

 

This was taken from deck 11, looking down, during one of the blue periods.

 

This was taken standing on deck 5, looking up.

 

This was Izumi - a delicious new Asian restaurant on board. For those of you know me well, you know I usually avoid seafood at all costs, but I stepped out of my comfort zone and tried something new -- and LOVED it. We ate here twice. And I didn't puke! Yay me!

 

The other side of Izumi.

 

My crispy Philly roll.

 

A's crispy shrimp roll.

 

My Dad's ACTUAL hard-core sushi plate. Nothing fried or disguised here. And no, I wasn't that ballsy - I just stuck to my panko crusted, flash-fried Philly roll.

 

The newly added Flowrider. It's a simulated surfing area that gushes out like 30,000 gallons of water a minute, and makes it really difficult to do anything. But, Z loved it, nonetheless! As did every child & teenager on the ship -- the line was always super long. (Groan ... I still dislike other people's kids.)

 

Z, testing it out.

 

Of course, there were several opportunities for shots of sunrises and sunsets. The amazing views are never far away when sailing on a cruise ship ...

 



 

This one was a sunrise, believe it or not. Yes, we actually got up early to run one morning.
(Notice I only said "one" morning ...)

 



Then there were the places we stopped. Since we've gone on several cruises, and all but one has been to the Western Caribbean, we've seen a lot of places more than once. But, we were very excited this time to go to a Caribbean spot we had not yet seen -- Roatan, Honduras. We chose a beach excursion that was utterly perfect -- they had a bar, some food, great views, and the chance to get a massage on the beach. All for $25 a person? Sign us up!

 

 

My view for the day.

 

Happy Z and even happier Mom.

This was $35 well spent. If you ever get the chance to get a massage on the beach in Roatan, I would highly suggest it. Pinch me - did that really happen?

 

Thanks, Z. 

 

Such beauty, everywhere you look. Happy sigh!

 

The other two stops were Belize and Cozumel. We've been to both before, so I didn't take a lot of pictures, since we just walked around with the sole purpose of finding local things to eat. Here are the few shots I did take, though, as we wandered around, happily.

The first thing we saw when we got off the boat in Belize.

 

A content Lawson clan, on the tender boat back from Belize.

 

Took this in Cozumel - our ship parked at the pier (on the right), and one of Royal Caribbean's giant ships (Allure of the Seas) parked next to us on the other side of the pier. Just when you think you are on a mind-blowingly large vessel, you see there is something even bigger out there. Wowsa!

 

Then there were the towel animals and the general lounging around on board ...

 

 

 

Suffice to say, it was a fantastic, wonderful, fun-filled week of laughter, food, and adult beverages. And of course, we cannot wait to do it all again next year. No solid plans have been made quite yet (hence the blank cruise ticker at the top of the blog page), but that's only because we are waiting for them to post sailings taking place next summer and next Christmas. We know we want to tackle a new part of the globe on the next trip, as well, so we have to narrow down which destination looks most appealing to everyone. In the front running now are the Virgin Islands and the Bahamas. We've done Alaska once and the Western Caribbean four times -- time for something new. And you know I'm excited, because new adventures are what get my blood pumping! CANNOT WAIT!

PS - I'm the most grateful girl in the world.

☮✝✿

 

Hysterectomy party at 39

Busy busy this week so far. I am desperately trying to get back on track with exercising, like everyone else after spring break, and have been determined this week to continue on with my C25K app that I started a few weeks ago. I even convinced Aaron to come out with me yesterday for a run. That was workout #2 for the week, and wow, it kicked my arse. Taking almost 2 weeks off during this program was apparently a huge mistake and yesterday I paid the price for those 2 weeks. Ouch! Legs felt like lead and the run seemed to drag on forever. Here's to hoping tomorrow's run will be less cruel. *tink glasses*

In addition to running, Zach's soccer games, and still navigating a new accounting system at my day job, I also had my yearly lady doctor vist yesterday. Ah, always joyful to go get poked, prodded, and felt up all in the name of science. As many of you know, I have a long, craptastic interesting  history with my female anatomy. It basically has a mind of its own and has been a long-standing nemesis of mine since the tender age of 10. That said, I am BFF with my gynecologist (going on 23 years now, yay us! I should buy us matching bracelets or something - no wait, HE should! he has all my money!) and I see him roughly every 3-4 months. He's like my quarterly report, you could say. Yesterday's appointment was especially interesting, because he finally came right out and said it -- he thinks I should consider getting a hysterectomy. Granted, this has been my wish for many, many years before now, of which he is well aware. BUT, he would always tell me to slow my roll, because I was still young, and he couldn't actually back me up with a legitimate reason to do so. I have had cysts, a scorching case of endometriosis that still marvels the medical world, and PCOS for nearly two decades, but apparently none of that counts when you're still "young" in the eyes of medicine. Well, it appears I have finally contracted one last devilish problem, and now, finally, I would be better off without my lady parts. Adenomyosis is my latest problem's name, and horrid pain is it's game. Just add it to my already 3-inch thick medical file taking up lots of shelf space at his office.

My uterus is engulfed in a sea of adenomyosis, which causes severe pain and sporadic bleeding. Fun, right? C'mon, admit it - that makes you happy you're not me, doesn't it? Despite the fact that I had 3 procedures done in November 2012 to alleviate all my OTHER symptoms, and surgery back in 1996 to alleviate the first set of problems I had, this little bugger still found a way to formulate and wreak havoc in my abdomen. So, looks like I might be going under the knife in the next coming months, with hopes that this 5th surgery will finally be my last. I might have a party. A big, wild, hysterectomy party - or, should we call it an eviction party for my uterus? Not sure exactly what this party would entail, but I'm already having visions of a piñata shaped like female anatomy that I could beat the crap out of, tampon bouquets from all the tampons I have under my sink that I will need to repurpose, and wearing ALL WHITE in reckless abandon. You laugh, but keep an eye out - you just might see an invitation show up soon.

☮✝✿

I'm back -- yes, again!

Forgive me one and all ... since the last time I wrote, I've been canoodling with the thought of starting a new blog site. Yes,  I have spent a good 6 months researching new sites, toying with the idea of buying my own domain, coming up with some distinctive internet identity, blah blah blah. I did hate the thought of leaving this one behind, and I'm sure I could've figured out how to link the new one to this one (if I had enough patience to research that ... which is questionable), but I have felt so uninspired the last year or so, and I kept blaming that on my blog site.

How stupid is that?

I kept telling myself if I just kick-started a brand new shiny blog, all of my writing inspiration would come flooding back to me. I would EXCITED to write new entries on a pretty new site - I mean, who wouldn't be, right?! Squeaky clean, new and full of limitless possibility ... yeah, well, I know myself enough to know that's probably not true. And the fact remains I am simply uninspired overall - whether or not I'm blogging.

I have recently found myself kinda bored with my awesome life. Isn't that shitty and scary to say out loud? I also still fight off waves of feeling self-indulgent when writing a blog ... like I'm putting too much weight on the fact that anyone would want to read what I have to say. But, I have realized since getting off of Facebook in May 2013 that I am missed. I have had people reach out to me, asking why they can't see what's going on with me anymore, why I left the world of Facebook, and why I don't blog anymore. I have to admit, it was nice to hear I've been missed and that people do, in fact, give a crap about what I have to say. After the fifteenth or so inquiry on when I'm going to start writing on my blog again, I thought, maybe I should re-commit to doing this. If nothing else, it would get me back on track of being grateful for my awesome life instead of just shuffling through it, mildly bored and simply going through the motions. Only boring people get bored, and I am NOT a boring person. I know that much, for sure.

So, here we are.

The truth is, I have become slightly lost lately, since my kid has started growing up so fast. He doesn't need me quite as much as he used to, and his focus has shifted onto his hobbies and his friends (as they should) and less on being with me. He's about 45 minutes away from starting middle school, and I'm floundering a little on where I fit into that. We are still extremely close and I'm still involved in everything, and then some, but he's unbelievably independent for his tender age of 11. I've become more of a coach now than a hands-on teacher. It's exciting, albeit slightly frightening, because I get to see all of me and Aaron's hard work of raising him come into play, but there's no denying he wants to do things on his own to see if he can, and we are just here to navigate. Roles have shifted slightly in our household lately, as they do when little people start becoming little grown-up people, and it's left me with more time to myself - time I don't know what to do with, honestly. My entire life focus has been him, for over a decade, and of course, what was the only thing I seemingly wanted during those years? What does every Mom on planet Earth want? Yes - more time for me. Well, now that I've got it, I have no clue what to do with it. So, as I'm trying to figure that out, I realized - what a perfect time to get back in to writing. I need to refocus on what I'm grateful for. I need to challenge myself and shake things up a bit. Who knows what that means, exactly, but I'm willing to try and find out, and document things along the way.

It feels good to be back. And back with purpose and intent to do this regularly. I know I've vowed before to keep up my blog, but life did get in the way. And you know what? That's totally ok - I'm glad I was there to give myself fully and not miss out on a single thing. But as I find myself with more "me" time now than ever over the past 11 years, this will be a good outlet for creativity, thoughts, and ideas about new things I want to try for myself. Won't you join me?

☮✝✿